self-regard you are not your worst enemy

Understanding Self-Regard

You must have a healthy self-regard in order to be successful. However, you’ve heard it said, “You are your own worst critic.” Being critical of yourself can be helpful in developing your abilities and character. However, often self-criticism results in focusing too much on negative aspects and allowing those to cripple improvement and forward progress.  In order to not let this occur, one must develop a healthy self-regard. The BlueEQ™ definition of self-regard is “having confidence in your own abilities and knowing that you matter and have inherent value.” Keep in mind that there is a vast difference between pride and self-regard. Pride comes from a place of insecurity whereas self-regard originates from confidence.

Psychologically safe environments, spaces in which people feel comfortable and confident sharing their opinions and being themselves without fear of criticism or judgement, cannot be formed if self-regard is not first developed. With the Solo Learning and BlueEQ™ partnership successfully established, the project to create a psychologically safe workplace through developing emotional intelligence is well underway. The next several posts will give a few tips on how to achieve this goal.  But for now, here are a few ways you can develop a higher self-regard.

Three Ways You Can Develop a Higher Self-Regard:

  1. Set and strive to achieve a few goals.

Set goals and determine to make them happen. We all love the feeling of checking items off a to-do list. It gives us the satisfaction of completion knowing we have successfully achieved what set out to accomplish. To begin with, create a “to-do list” for yourself. Examine yourself to identify a few changes you would like to take place and set some goals accordingly, both work and personal. Develop benchmarks to keep yourself accountable towards achieving these goals. Finally, if you fall behind, do not quit. Pick up where you left off and keep pressing on towards the end result. Achieving these goals and proving what you can accomplish will build self-regard.

  1. Find humor in your personal imperfections.

Everyone has imperfections; we are human. It is ridiculous to pretend you do not. Furthermore, no one wants to be around people who take themselves too seriously. Without excusing unfavorable or unacceptable behavior, try to find humor in your personal imperfections. When you stop taking yourself so seriously, you show others that you accept yourself and have confidence in spite of flaws. If you portray that to others, you will start to feel it yourself.

  1. Show patience and kindness to others.

Even though you may be able to find humor in your own imperfections, you should never point out the flaws of others. A confident, self-regarding individual has respect for others above themselves. The more you pour into people with kindness and patience, the more life- giving people will want to be around you. When you display qualities such as these, before long, they will become habits and your self-regard and confidence will increase as a result.

More on Self-Regard

These are just three of the countless tips for developing a higher self-regard and emotional intelligence. This does not even scratch the surface of the vast knowledge that can be found by participating in our BlueEQ™ personal assessment and workshop. Visit our page at www.sololearning.com/emotional-intelligence/ for more information about this exciting new initiative.

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